Rule #86 - Shoes say a lot about the man.

I agree. Shoes DO say a lot about the man. I'm not just saying this because I love shoes and would have a different pair for each day of the week if I could. I guess if you want to get technical I do have at least that many. 17 pairs of shoes to be exact, but that is a minor detail. The point is that I love shoes.



Having the right shoes is paramount to the success of any outfit (or ensemble if you prefer, and I do). Perhaps this post is revealing some of my metrosexual tendencies, but I've come to far already, there is no turning back. It is for this reason that I have so many shoes, and why if I had more money (or a higher limit on my credit card...) I would have even more zapatos, as Spanish Mike would say. The reality is that most of my shoes are rarely worn, simply because they must be matched appropriately with the rest of my ensemble. So if you see me on a fairly regular basis you are probably saying to yourself, "He wears the same shoes most of the time, what the heck is Carl talking about." It is true. The last few years my ensembles have gotten increasingly casual making my shoe options limited. I usually wear whatever pair of sneaks I have that are the newest, with little variation. This is why I must be very selective when buying new sneaks, I need a versatile pair that goes with pretty much everything and that I wouldn't mind wearing almost everyday.

Here are my current #1 pair of sneaks:


They are white, black and grey, allowing for maximum outfit matchability. I can wear them with shorts and with jeans of all shades. But I can't use these sneaks for everything, that would be silly. So I have other shoes for other utilities, as follows:


These are my dress shoes, for use with suits or slacks.


These are my semi-dress shoes, because they can be used with slacks, but also with a nice pair of jeans and a button up shirt.


These are my boots, for use in cold or snowy weather. I have probably worn these twice since i have been in Oklahoma.


These are my white Nike kicks, for when I want to be pretty fly for a white guy.


These are my imitation Birkenstocks, used when I need to take Henry outside and don't feel like putting on socks (yes, they smell) or for when I want to feel like a hippie.


And of course I can't forget my running shoes, used for running. Putting this picture up made me realize I didn't count my 2 pairs of soccer cleats and 1 pair of turf shoes in my count (sorry, no pics of these, they live in my car's trunk in case of spontaneous soccer) so i actually have 20 pairs of shoes. The shoes that I did not take pictures of I probably should give or throw away because they serve no unique purpose in my life, but I am a pack rat and will probably keep them for the next 10-20 years.

Finally, allow me to introduce you all to the newest member of my shoe harem, recently purchased and en route to Stillwater as we speak.


These are my Livestrong Lunar Trainer+ running shoes. They were my gift to myself this Christmas (well, them and my new iPhone 3G...) and are intended to motivate me to train hard and live strong in the '09.

So if my opening salvo were true and shoes really do say a lot about the man, what do my shoes say about me? After rereading this entry I realize my shoes say that I am a vain and superficial individual with a shoe shopping compulsion, nay, obsession. And I am okay with that.

Proof that Winterfunk Exists...

Just so you see how Winterfunky I am right now it is almost midnight and I'm about to go to the gas station to buy a 44 oz. fountain coke and some Skittles and then watch the new Get Smart movie (Starring Michael Scott from the Office).

I also have subconsciously been growing a beard (see below), which embodies the spirit of Winterfunk. It says, "I have nothing but time on my hands, but I also have no reason to shave, so now I have a beard."


You can start to see where the beard is trying to meet the hair on the back of my neck.

Winterfunk

I know I spoiled all of you by posting a ton during my 12 hour cleaning spree and i apologize. I do not envision posting on this blog that much unless it for a special circumstance (such as me cleaning, trust me it won't happen often). I also realize that with all of those posts I can not post for about a week and still average more than 1 a day, which is a good average to have if you ask me. And you don't because I just told you. But I wouldn't do that to you, especially not when there is much to talk about.

So here it is: I am in a funk. I think it has more to do with the time of year than the fact that I did not get a chance to spend the holidays with family. If you recall from one of my first posts (click here if you do not want to scroll down you lazy bum) I am trying to come up with a name for the time between Christmas and New Years Day, other than the "holiday season." Try this on for size:

"Winterfunk"

It sounds like it could be German in origin, and if mispronounced also sounds like seasonal copulation. In any case, I think it encompasses the "black hole" feeling I get this time of the year. Winterfunk doesn't have to be a bad time, it just gets at the funkiness of the days in between two of the biggest holidays of the year. I envision Winterfunk being a bit like Ramadan or any other holiday where more than one day is observed, except that instead of fasting all day, during Winterfunk it is tradition to sleep all day and eat all the time during your waking hours. You must also worship the TV and bask in its radiated glow. A CSI marathon, what, jackpot! When you think about it, it is almost like hibernating or saving energy for all of those pesky New Year's resolutions you will inevitably attempt to (unsuccessfully) hold yourself to.

So let yourself go, there are 2 more days of Winterfunk to enjoy/sleep through. Embrace the opportunity. And while your at it, can someone please create a Wikipedia entry started for Winterfunk? That way the holiday will be one step closer to legitimacy, because if it is on Wikipedia then it is good enough to be cited by me in a paper.

Wow that was exhausting, I think I need to continue observing this new sacred holiday and take a nap/watch TV. Have a mellow Winterfunk everyone!


This is how Henry and I roll during Winterfunk, fyi.

Time's Up

You may be wondering how I ended up doing in my 12 hour challenge to clean and organize 7 months worth of mess and clutter. Well, lets see...




I organized my closet, washed and folded all of my clothes AND put them away, made the bed for the first time in God knows how long, and cleared away everything else that did not need to be in the bedroom.


I scrubbed the floor with bleach cleaner, organized all the random bathroom and cleaning supplies in a new set of plastic drawers, wiped down the sink, bathtub and toilet, and windexed the mirror.


I cleared out all of the trash from the kitchen counters, wiped them down, washed ALL of the dishes, and put them away neatly.

I even washed the futon cover and cleared away most of the stuff around my desk. Unfortunately that is where this challenge ended. I still have some stuff left to sort through and put away in the desk area, as well as on the bookshelf. It's not going to take long, but I couldn't make it by 1:30am. I also still need to vacuum the floor of all the dog hair and other bits of Henry's toys which he has shredded.


So this is what I will finish up before I go to sleep. I've come this far I may as well perservere and get it all done. I must say, even though I didn't finish everything in 12 hours like I had hoped/planned, I am still impressed with myself. This is more cleaning than I probably have ever done in a sustained period of time. In sum I threw out 8 bags of trash (plus 3 pizza boxes), did 9 loads of laundry, and filled two bags with clothes I am going to donate to Goodwill. Not a bad day's work.

I will end this entry (thanks for bearing with me through all of this) with Rule #33 - Never go back to your place.

Now if I were wedding crashing I wouldn't go back to my place only because of this rule--not because it looks (and smells) like a pig sty.

I will post pics of the living room when it is vacuumed and sorted through. You stay classy, people out there reading my blog.

-Carl

Time is Short

I have less than 3 hours left now, and it is looking iffy. With that in mind here is a quick before and after of the bedroom so you can see the difference.

Past Halfway...

Those of you who know me will realize that rarely am I ahead of schedule. If I have a time limit or a deadline I generally take up all of the allotted time (for better or worse). This is usually very stessful, especially when I procrastinate research proposals for an entire year, but that is neither here nor there. What is here is the fact that I have less than 6 hours to go in this apartment cleaning bonanza challenge (the name needs a little work, any ideas?). SO am I going to be cutting it close, as usual. I am still making progress, but I cracked under the pressure and took about an hour and a half break earlier before recovering to continue my assault on the bedroom. Why the bedroom first? Well I have actually not had a clean bedroom in the 7 months I have lived in this apartment. There was just a lot to do in terms of organizing and rearranging, so I always focused on the easier parts of the apartment. Not today though, I am still chugging along in the bedroom and soon should be finished (barring any other "breaks").



The bed is ready and made with clean sheets. I can actually sleep on it for the first time in months!



Sorry futon, it's been real, but I have got a date with a full-size mattress tonight. You understand, don't you?

4 Hours In, 8 Hours Left

Okay so I don't know what is worse, the fact that it has been four hours since I started cleaning/organizing and it feels like it's been 24 hours, or the fact that it has been 4 hours since I started cleaning and I haven't even finished the bedroom yet.

I have less than 8 hours to go and much to do, so back to work. At least my closet is almost completely done.

Taking a Break

Henry is taking me for a walk right now, I will post a new update when
we return.

-Carl

Sent from my iPhone

2 Hours Down

Progress is coming...slowly but surely. Here is a previously cluttered and messy corner:


Voila!













And in honor of my friend who actually is a part of a wedding this weekend, here are some of my favorite rules of wedding crashing:

Rule #7 - Blend in by standing out.
Rule #19 - Toast in the native language if you know the native language and have practiced the toast. Do not wing it.
Rule #36 - Your favorite movie is "The English Patient".
Rule #78 - The unmarried female rabbi - is she fair game? Of course she is.
Rule #85 - Don't use the "I have two months to live" bit - not cool, not effective.
Rule #115 - Never walk away from a crasher in a funny jacket

Have fun my friend, and good hunting.

PS: If you are in St. Louis and are looking for a wedding to crash, tomorrow at St. Gabriel's Catholic Church...

1 Hour Complete

So far, so good. Ties taken out of box and hung up, check.

-Carl


Sent from my iPhone

Cleaning

We are now firmly entrenched in the no-man's land between Christmas and New Year's. The days between the 25th and 31st should have an official name in my opinion, and no, the "holiday season" does not cut it. For me personally these next few days are like a black hole of productivity. I have traditionally used this time to do absolutely nothing significant (you are probably thinking that could also describe any weekend for me, and you are probably right). The days seem to float by and my time is taken up by the following activities:

1)Sleep
2)Eating junk food
3)TV
4)Internet
5)Sleep

What, jackpot! This seems like the perfect day in the life of Carl, right?

Wrong.

Don't get me wrong, I love being lazy as much as the next oaf, but I am tired of living in a black hole of productivity. A black hole is a region of space which has a gravitational pull so strong that nothing, not even my stellar work ethic, can escape it. Who would want to live there?

So here I find myself, typing this blog and contemplating what I need to do before New Years Day. Trust me folks, I have plenty I could/should do. Having stuff to do is not the issue. I KNOW what I need to do first, but the pull of the black hole is strong. Here is where this blog comes in--for accountability. What I am going to attempt has never been successfully done before (in my life at least). I am going to clean and organize my apartment, top to bottom, wall to wall, in the next 12 hours. 12 hours probably seems like an eternity to you, the reader (I hope someone is still reading), especially considering that my apartment is not that large. But here is what I am up against: I hate cleaning, I have a very short attention span, I don't have space for all my crap, and most importantly, my apartment is disgustingly messy. This is no easy challenge my friends.






I will post throughout the 12 hour race against the clock/test of my willpower. Wish me luck.

The Future

RULE #30:
Know the playbook so you can call an audible.

You probably are astounded by the connection I am making between the rule above and the future, so i will let it sink in for a few seconds.
.
.
.
Okay, so something that has been on my mind a lot recently has been my future. I am usually more of a "live in the moment" type of person, not because I am a cliche (even though I am), but because I tend to get overwhelmed when I start to think about what's going on next week, let alone what I will be doing when I graduate this May with my Master's. So yeah, it is a daunting thought, that I really have no clue where I will be after May.

The question I am asked the most these days is, "So what are your plans after you graduate?", followed closely with, "Where do you want to go?/Do you want to go back to the Northeast?".

I do not know people. I will be kicking my job search into full gear in January, but as for specifics, I've got nothing. Nada. Zilch. Zippo.

My answer is simple and sounds monumentally ambiguous, but it's true.

I am looking for the right fit.

What does that even mean?! People say it all the time, but let's be real here, I am way more (insert complimentary adjective here) than most people, so let me explain and prepare to be amazed (or please just bear with me). To me the concept of "fit" means that a given set of criteria (different of course for each individual) are satisfied, and if all are not met, the ones that are are (wow, I just typed "are are" and feel dumb, but will leave it because it is late and I am too tired to figure out any other way to phrase it) sufficiently compelling to still make it feel right.

My point is that you have to know what you are looking for (the "playbook" if you are following my Wedding Crasher's analogy) because when there isn't a perfect "fit" you can still find the best fit for what you are looking for (by calling an "audible" if I have to keep spelling it out).


One thing I do know for sure about my future is that I will watch this video many more times (and so should you).

One Semester of Spanish Spanish Love Song

From Stillwater with love

Just because I want to try posting from my phone, and because Henry is
a cute puppy when he is sleepy (see below if you do not trust my eye
for puppy cuteness).

Would I lie to you?

-Carl

Sent from my iPhone

Christmas

In honor of Christmas (it's Christmas here for at least another half hour) I want to give you a gift. Enjoy!

The Rules

One of my favorite movies of all times is Wedding Crashers, a movie about, well, crashing weddings. I am not sure if this is an indicator of my immaturity or of my love affair with Vince Vaughn movies. Nevertheless, I have seen this movie at least 30 times. I could have said a million times for effect, but that would have been an exaggeration, because I have not seen it that many times. No one has, that would be impossible. To prove this point allow me to assume that the movie is approximately 2 hours long. That would be 2 million hours worth of movie to watch. Divide that by 24 hours in a day you get about 83,333 days worth of movie. Divide that by 365 days in a year and you are looking at more than 228 years of movie! That's ludicrous! The oldest person ever verified (Jeanne Clement of France in case you were wondering) lived to be 122 years and 164 days. Even if she had been watching Wedding Crashers from the time of her birth until her death she would have been 100 years short. But I digress.

Where was I? Ah yes, the movie. I love it. It is hilarious, irreverent, and has Rachel McAdams in it. That being said, you may have noticed the name of this blog is "Rule #76: No Excuses, Play Like a Champion!". That is not just a motivational ploy on my part (that's part of it), it is one of the classic lines from Wedding Crashers. Those of you who have sen the movie no doubt already put this together (those few of you who haven't, well I trust you will be on your way to Blockbuster shortly). It is one of the 115 Rules of Wedding Crashing. And that is the theme of this blog. I will finish each entry with a different rule to live by (or crash weddings by, I'm not splitting hairs here) or quote from the movie.

So sit back and enjoy my ramblings, pictures, and videos. I entertain myself and hopefully this crap will entertain you too. If not, I seriously question your sense of humor, because I am the funniest person I know. Ask me sometime.

And with that, I leave you with the tag line from Wedding Crashers (it is really really poignant given the upbeat and inspiring nature of this blog):

LIFE IS A PARTY. CRASH IT.